Our society needs to be reintroduced to civility. Let’s face it – we are never going to see everything the same way. Whether it be masks, viruses, politics, laws, finances, sports or even car manufacturers, people are going to take a passionate stance about what they believe. However, it used to be that we could disagree without being demonized by the other side. We could honestly debate without causing deep division. We could hold a dissenting viewpoint without becoming the object of derision. Instead, we have a “cancel culture” today where people are discounting other’s opinions and boycotting their life’s work just because they find a point of disagreement with them. I’m afraid that civility is becoming a lost virtue in all parts of our culture today.

Civility, by definition, simply means “formal politeness and courtesy in behavior or speech.” It can run the gamut from holding the door at an appropriate time to knowing the appropriate time to hold your tongue. The Bible has some much-needed wisdom for us about why civility is critical to our testimony. As Christians each of us are to be “salt and light” in this world. I’m convinced that one of the ways we do this is to demonstrate this important principle to the lost people of this world. Take a few minutes to read the wisdom and instruction found in Proverbs 15:1-5, then ask yourself these diagnostic questions about your own behavior:

1. Is my intention to INCITE anger or to INVITE peace? (v.1) The words and the tone we use will lead to either anger or peace. We will either intentionally use a soft answer to defuse the situation or we will emotionally use our grievous words and stir up the anger in others.


2. Is my response CREDIBLE or just meaningless CHATTER? (v.2) Passing along untrue information and unhelpful opinions will only serve to discredit our position. Bolster your knowledge with facts and then be purposeful to only share that knowledge when it will be helpful to the situation. That takes wisdom!


3. Would this be my response if I wasn’t ANONYMOUS? (v.3) Many acts of incivility occur on the internet where people feel like they are shrouded with anonymity. Most would not say the things they post online if you met them in person. However, we must remember that nobody is anonymous before God. He sees our actions, our words, and the intentions of our hearts.


4. Are my words GIVING life or GOUGING destructively? (v.4) Words do hurt. We will either give people truth and hope with our words or we will tear people down with them. As givers of the truth of the Gospel, the world needs to see Christians as the ones who are always ready to share the words that bring them life (found in Jesus Christ) in all things.


5. Am I willing to CONCEDE or CHANGE if confronted? (v.5) The older generation are not a bunch of washed up, senseless, out of touch people with outdated ideas. Remember, there is “nothing new under the sun” – and they have seen more of life than you. Seek the counsel of your elders and be willing to take reproof. You may need to change your position!

Our culture is not going to change course without God’s intervention. God has chosen His church to be that agent of change. Christian, don’t feed into our culture of incivility. Instead, be a model of virtue before the corner of the world where you live. Only then will we be used as God’s agents of change in the culture around us – not to just introduce civility once again, but to introduce the lost of this world to the hope found in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Your good words and good works may be what God uses to open the door to the light of the gospel in someone’s life. “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16)