God hates sin. He is holy and perfect and can not have sin in His presence. Sin makes God angry and God will one day judge the whole world for their sin. We are all held accountable as individuals for the sin in our lives. Even Jesus unleashed his anger toward sin with the money changers in the temple. We know that the Bible tells us “the wages of sin is death” (Romans 3:23). There is no question how God feels about sin.

However, we also know that God loves people. Romans 5:8 tells us that “God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” He went to extreme lengths for us to have our sins forgiven and to be reconciled to Him. While we know that God does punish sinners in hell because of sin, He is still “longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance” (2 Peter 3:9).

So why do we have such a hard time with loving sinners while hating sin? Some people tend to take a harsh view of sin and allow that to develop into a hatred of the people involved in it. Others tend to overemphasize our call to love people so much that they just choose to overlook their sin. But God calls us to condemn sin and at the same time show compassion to the sinner. If you struggle with this balance, here are three simple things to give you some perspective:

A Sense of RELIEF – “There but for the grace of God, go I” should be your mindset when you view someone entrenched in their sin. While you may not be ensnared by the same sin as them, the temptation to sin is “common to man” (1 Corinthians 10:13). You are not immune to sin in your life and may not even be aware of how your thoughts or actions are offensive to God or others. Loving the sinner requires you to identify with their position and reflect on the grace of God that has given you the ability to resist the same temptation in your own life.

A Desire for REPENTANCE – Is it your greatest desire for the sinner to repay for or repent of their sins? Is your desire for judgment and vengeance greater than your desire for them to repent? In Jesus’ parable of Luke 18, the people wanted the corrupt publican to get his just dues and be punished for his evil ways. But God’s desire was for true, heartfelt repentance which is why he responded positively when the publican pleaded to God for mercy (Luke 18:13-14). When we desire to see God’s judgment more than God’s mercy in a sinner’s life, then we have not truly loved them as God does.

A Willingness to RECONCILE – Especially when someone’s sin has affected or offended you personally (and maybe even habitually!), your first reaction may be to cut them off from your life. In some cases (such as abuse, fraud, etc..) this may be needed for your own protection. But even in cases when reconciliation is not possible you must evaluate your own heart towards them. If they were to acknowledge their sin, ask for forgiveness, and be held accountable, would you be willing to work towards reconciliation with them? Do you realize that this is what Christ came to accomplish between you and God? Even though you are a sinner from birth, God does not want you to be cut off from a relationship with Him. The Bible tells us that Christ has “broken down the middle wall of partition between us… that he might reconcile both unto God in one body by the cross” (Ephesians 2:14-16). A heartfelt love for the sinner means there is a longing to be reconciled to them again.

It's a tough balance to have a true love for sinners while maintaining a godly, righteous anger against sin. Be thankful for God’s grace to save a sinner such as yourself and be assured that God wants them to come to a place of repentance. Our goal shouldn’t be to cut off these people but to convince them to turn from their sin, turn to Christ, and be reconciled to God. Show them the love of Christ but don’t turn a blind eye to sin. Love the sinner – but hate the sin!